Dec 16, 2008 12:13 am US/Eastern
Personality Is Key In Rocky Relationships
MIAMI (CBS4) ―
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Knowing your personality type could be the key to a good marriage.
CBS
It's long been said that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. But problems in relationships may have less to do with gender, and more to do with personality.
We promise for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. But a wedding vow also includes the unspoken promise of "I'll put up with you."
So why is it more difficult for some couples? Maybe it's because opposites often attract.
"In the beginning, many times in a relationship, we like the fact that they're different; but slowly over time, then it starts to get irritating and we want to change them, and of course they're not going to change," said author and self-proclaimed relationship expert Brian Klemmer.
According to Klemmer, there are four basic personality types:
- The controller is a person who is results-oriented and wants to be in charge.
- The supporter is someone who is very accepting and who finds it hard to say no.
- The analyst is someone who likes structure and is motivated by reason and logic.
- The promoter is an outgoing person who is spontaneous.
"If we had a promoter wife and we had an analytic husband, the husband is very meticulous, precise, structured, and if the wife says, 'hey, let's go to dinner tonight,' that might irritate him because it's last minute, they like structure," explained Klemmer.
By determining your personality type and that of your partner, Klemmer says you can avoid conflict.
"One of the things that it does is it causes us to accept each other, rather than try and make each other into what we are," admitted Klemmer.
Knowing your partner and yourself can also help you communicate and compromise. The experts say respect, cooperation and understanding are important to any good relationship.
(© MMIX, CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved.)
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